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On Saturday June 28th I met up with FeLady, Mr. FeLady and their friends Mr. and Mrs. Chico to take my second shot at swimming from Alcatraz to Aquatic Park without getting eaten by a Shark. It was the FeLadies 5th swim. Mrs. Chico is the smart one of the group and was just along to socialize and be our sherpa. Her husband is the loony one in the family and was also out for Sharkfest #5.

As you can see, Cheryl and I suited up in sushi just to make things a little more interesting. Were we being chums or would we be chum? That was the question. Interestingly enough, both of us had had fantasies that the event might be canceled due to low visibility. No such luck. The skies were gray and there was wind but you could see just fine.

We suited up in neoprene and headed over to the ferry. This is a fairly long walk that must really amuse the tourists. Where else can you see 800+ wetsuit clad people and 20 or so non-wetsuit nut cases marching along one of the world's most famous tourist attractions? Fisherman's wharf's finest hour if you ask me. Not that it took an hour to walk to the ferries but it does take about 15 - 20 minutes. It's a good time to take a few deep breaths and get in touch with the reality that you are about to jump off a boat in dark and very cold water and swim for quite a while.

The ride out is the ride out. More time to panic if you don't mind your mental machinations. I did not panic. I trusted myself and my experience and tried not to think about how badly I wanted to run out of the water at Couer d'Alene where the water temp was at least 1 or 2 degrees warmer. I kid you not. Sharkfest allows neoprene hoods but not booties. I had neither. I did have 2 caps, though.

T-minus no more time left and we are at the door with the guy yelling "JUMP!". As soon as I hit the water I hear some woman from the other ferry screaming over and over and over "WAHHHHH! WAHHHHH ! WAHHHHH!". I really wanted to yell "STOP THAT - YOU ARE TIPPING MY WAH"* but I knew she could never hear me over the din of her own terror and besides I figured she was one of the nut jobs with no wetsuit so who was I to criticize?.

We lined up at the kayaks and waited and waited and waited and waited some more for the horn to blow. Finally something happened and we all started swimming and that's when things got really dicey. First of all it meant that it was time to put my face in the ice bucket - ow. Second of all I soon discovered that it was very, very rough out there.

My last recollection of being tossed around by water was when I was a kid playing in the surf at the beach on Long Island sound. Scary but I could touch the bottom. Not here. The water was sort of roiling and rough and I think there were currents to deal with. All I could do was poke my head up once in a while and try to find the 2 towers I was sighting on. The problem is that I'm not good l at stopping and looking around. I just want to keep swimming and swimming but I have no skill at all in holding a line. Can you spell z-i-g z-a-g?

So the swim went like this - zig, zag, roll, bounce, blub, blub, blub, swim, swim,swim, look up, correct, zig, zag, blub, blub, blub.... you get the idea. I drank quite a bit of salt water. I'd draw you one of those amusing pictures but honestly I have no idea. I just kept going. I was gratified to find myself not all alone after 15 minutes like I was last year. I could always look up and spot yellow caps and boats and that gave me great comfort. In fact, there was a guy in a speedo (crazy bastard!) who I met up with repeatedly. I knew he was making the best time he possibly could for shore so I took that as a good sign.

The amazing thing about an event like this is that all you can do is keep trying to move forward no matter how totally unnatural it is and let me assure you, clawing at water from a horizontal position to gain forward momentum and trying to breath and not panic is about the most unnatural thing I've ever done. That's the part I love. It is positively surreal - no drugs needed!

At some point I realized that I could see the porches on the building I was sighting on and then I could see the orange buoy on the lead boat and I knew I was actually making progress. Then I could see the seawall and the masts of the C.A.Thayer and I swam harder and there was the speedo guy. I probably headed more to the left of the entrance to Aquatic Park than I needed to but there is a current that will pull you back toward it so it's better to head left than to try to hit the thing dead on.

Finding that opening and getting through it was a kind of relief you feel only when the traffic jam you are stuck in breaks up in just enough time for you to make your flight. It's just like that. In that moment you know you will get to the shore and get out of that water and you will live to tell the tale. Last year I was so knocked out I couldn't even find the buoys that mark the exit but not so this time. I saw those buoys, made a bee line and finally realized that my hand was hitting sand and I was in about 12 inches of water. HUZZAH! I stood up and ran out on the stubs at the end of my legs. My feet had checked out of service about 10 minutes into the swim.

As soon as I stood up I turned around and was elated to see the waters of Aquatic Park chock full of swimmers who were coming in behind me. My time was not so great and I was 15 out of 18 in my AG (FeLady was 9th - TOP TEN!!) but I was 171 out of 223 women (FeLady was numbah 100!) compared to last year when I was 162/209. So I moved up a few slots. The important thing is that I lived, trust me.

There were really 2 great lessons in this experience. The first lesson is that if you just keep going and don't give up you can get there (absent any medical issues like hypothermia or broken bones). I used that thought extensively on Sunday when I decided to climb Mt. Diablo after riding 35 or 40 miles. I wanted to quit and just head down the hill but I kept envisioning orange buoys and shore and I kept pedaling and I got where I needed to be. The second lesson is that FeLady and I are chums. Not chum - chums. We had a great time together.

*ShoGun reference. I think that was the phrase. Does anyone else remember?

A couple months ago I was driving to work listening to the local classic rock radio station (KFOG) and "The Fog Files" was playing. The Fog Files is the news guy's (Peter Finch) feature show. This one was about a Silicon Valley Venture Capitalist who also happens to be a middle aged woman who struggles with weight - just like me! She was driving to work one day, listening to the radio (harmonic convergence!) and thinking about a meeting she would soon be attending. She knew that at this meeting there would be plate of cookies and she would eat them and then hate herself (more harmonic convergence!) and she wondered why it is that there are songs about loving and losing and getting the guy and getting dumped but not a single song about resisting cookies.

In that AHA moment she returned to that comfortable old aphorism - if you need something done right you have to do it yourself and so she did. First she wrote some song lyrics to express her feelings about weight and food. Then she spoke with some industry people about how to go about getting these songs produced and they told her to hire top talent in the music writing and vocals arena. Being that she's a Silicon Valley Venture Capitalist she has more money than fat so that's what she did.

Harmonic convergence entered my life yet again when I got an email a couple weeks later asking me if I'd like to review the CD. "Bring it on!" I said, I already heard about this on the radio.

So that's the story behind the review of Skinny Songs by Heidi Roizan. And what about that review?

I admire Ms. Roizen for doing something positive about this cookie problem. Way to go! Clearly this has worked for you You look great, not to mention the fact that this has brought you face to face with Martha! I'm impressed! (see pic below)

As for the music - she did a smart thing by making some of them very country, a couple of them sort of hip-hopish and some more mainstream rock. The rhythm is set to workout speed so you can hear words of affirmation about what you are doing while you do it and that's always a good thing. There are lyrics to remind you of why you really want to lose weight:
From "Who the Hell is That"
who the hell is that? 'Cause it sure ain't me!
how'd I get so fat? It's a shame to see
something's gone wrong with the photo quality
who the hell is that, cause it sure ain't me

And lyrics to remind you that it's all up to you and that you really want it and YOU CAN DO IT!
From "You Da Boss"
But you don't need that piece of pie
Gotta let it go and pass you by
and I'm here to remind you why
'cause you want to be lookin' and feelin' fly

"You Got to Use it to Lose" is my particular fave but truth be told it's the kind of exercise music that gets stuck in your head and just hangs around like post workout sock stink.

I'm not nuts about most of the music (I'm not a fan of country or hip hop) but I think the CD is a great idea and expect there are people out there for whom this collection would represent a huge source of motivation and assistance in the battle of the bulge. Although the marketing is clearly targeting women, many of the songs are sung by men so I think they could relate.

They have a line of shirts, too (look - it's Martha!!) I find some of them offensive but when it comes to my body I've never had a very good sense of humor.

Bottom line - this CD isn't really to my taste but I applaud her effort and I encourage anyone who does daily hand to mind combat with fattening food to check it out - it could be just what you have been looking for.

My weekend in southern California was super fun.

I got in Friday night and DN2 (Pookie, Daughter Number 2) picked me up at the airport and off we went to a Mexican food place she's been telling me about for the last year and half. When she talked about it I was sure she was telling me about Cody Hahn which I thought was one of those comical restaurant names like Carols Goldstien or Shamus Gonzales. I was wrong. We went to this place

A woman who was there asked how it is pronounced and suffice it to say that Cody Hahn is somewhat lacking but there's no good way to write it. What's more important than the name was the meal - a ginormous plate of nachos. When we both declared ourselves stuffed DN2 took her water and poured it all over what was left on the plate. I was both stunned and impressed. If you need help to quit stuffing your face do try it - it was 100% effective.

Back to the on-campus apartment we headed, stopping first to meet her friends who were puppy sitting. A picture of the pup is forthcoming but alas, I don't have it yet. Petting a puppy was EXACTLY what I needed. That and a strawberry creamcheese empanada from a Paula Dean recipie. Yum!

After a night of sleep that reminded me of how hard sleep can be to come by on a college campus I got up, ran 6 miles, showered, had a protein shake and then DN2 and I headed for a day at the San Diego Zoo where we walked our feet down to nubbins. I made a movie of our day that is at the end of this post.

Then it was off to Long Beach to see my prodigal Son and have dinner at McKennas By the Bay. It was lovely to see where he lived and have a really nice meal.

Saturday night, completely spent from traipsing around the zoo and then driving a couple hundred miles I slept like the dead. No amount of collegiate ruckus could penetrate my slumber and apparenlty I dreamt of running because DN2 told me I sort of snored only what she described as a snore sounded like I was inhaling through my nose and making whoofing exhales through my mouth.

As much as I loved all of that I think Sunday was my favorite day. We got up a little later and headed to the La Jolla shore for brunch. First we stopped by Children's Beach where the children have been displaced by a colony of seals.

We watched them for quite some time before heading up to the Brockton Villa Restaurant for some Coast Toast. If there is something more sublime than a beautiful sunny day on the veranda enjoying the deliciousness of Coast Toast I'm not sure what it is in this moment. My mind is suffused in a maple syrup sunshine pool of bliss. mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...........

We were very happy

After brunch we stood overlooking the water and watched the world's most amazing body surfer. With the aid of fins and webbed gloves this guy was able to ride right on top of the waves from way out until he had to duck under to keep from getting tossed on the rocks. I included a couple of shots of him the video.

Our final tour was of the Birch Aquarium but at that point my camera was out of battery from all the video I shot so I have no pictures.
Many thanks to DN2, Pookie for showing me such a great weekend.

Here is my video memento of the trip. I took all of these with my humble little Casio camera so please pardon its inability to maintain focus on the close-ups.

Are you as pooped as I am today? Holy Guacamole - I'm just trashed.

Thank you all for the kind words about my doggie. I still feel horrible about it and I keep listening for her toenails click clacking across the floor but you are all correct - it had to be done and I did it out of love and now I just have to wait for the bad feelings to pass.

I had a fabulous weekend in San Diego and I want to tell you all about it but honestly, I'm too tired. I will leave you with this little slide show and the promise of more to come (I know... but really - I'M TIRED!)

Today was a gloomy day. A gray and cold and wet day. The kind of day where even going out to get the mail takes energy but I'm a mail junkie so out I went. When I opened the box what, to my great surprise should I find but this:

It was a package from Down Under bearing a very formidable ID RECORDED sticker.

Whoa! I thought. Do I have a drug dealer I didn't know about? But then I remembered that Katy the Greaty had said she was going to send me something and squealing with delight I fairly skipped back into the house to see what wondrous thing was tucked into the unassuming but duly noted package (they've got your number, girl!)

Fingers trembling with anticipation, I tore open the package to discover this:

SUSHI TAPE!!!!!
(click for a bigger view. Go on! It's totally worth it!)

I got very verklempt and had to actively engage in full restraint to keep from wrapping my body in that tape and heading for the nicest restaurant in town with my sushi hat on me 'ead (that's Aussie for 'on my head') and a sushi tape dress on me bod.

That's DPR and me in our sushi hats

Refrain I did, though because I think that sushi tape is destined for better things.

Katy- you are just the bestest! You've made my holiday season complete.

To those of you who celebrate Christmas I wish you a very Merry Christmas filled with love and joy and happiness and may all your days follow suit.

For those of you who don't I wish you the same today, tomorrow and every day.

My little bit of Christmas Cheer can be found over here at Completerunning.com (thanks to the first person who pointed the way - I've forgotten who it was)

I've been a New Yorker subscriber on and off for years. It started when I was in college and read a fantastic short story in my roommate's New Yorker. I was hooked. And of course, no matter how busy you are there are always the jokes.

When I found myself with a house full of unread New Yorkers I quit subscribing. A few years later I couldn't resist and ponied up again. I now have a year's worth of New Yorkers that need to be read. I do read the jokes every week, though.

If that fails me I can always just go to YouTube and get my New Yorker humor that way. Like this:

I'm not convinced that the animation and sound add much to the equation. What do you think?