The same tightness in my throat that led me to changing blood pressure medications last year has returned. The feeling has been plaguing me for months now. There is no rhyme or reason to its onset. It occurs every day but at varying times. Holding my current blood pressure medication or adding allergy medication does seem to make any difference. One thing that does affect it is my emotions.

Last night, while sitting in unusually heavy traffic on the way to my track workout, I was broadsided by a bout of sadness. I wiped away the tears in the parking lot, and did my best to shake it off. I chose to warm up on the track to allow for a bit more time to myself but I was running side by side another runner within seconds. We made small talk and stayed together throughout the warm up period.

Before long, we were breaking into our groups. I questioned whether I was ready to join my usual group but decided I'd give it a try. As usual, the group was off to a speedy running start. We were doing mile repeats x 5-6. I hit the first lap right on target and exceptionally out of breath. I felt my desired pace slipping away as the mile wore on, and began fighting with the return of the sadness. Tired of having my husband's death be an excuse for my lack of performance, I began cursing myself for my weakness. This was in spite of my knowing that self-induced bashing has never resulted in positive results either.

By the time I hit the 3rd repeat, I was mentally and physically defeated. At this point, I could not hold off the sadness any longer. I walked away from the group as the tears began to flow. Somehow, I pulled myself together long enough to join the group for another mile. This would be my final repeat as I was out of time before I needed to pick up Ryan from football practice. I told myself that I *could* finish it, however poor my performance was. Within the first 200 meters, however, the emotions were taking over. My throat was tightening, which took my mind right back to the first time I can remember this occurring - when my husband was dying. I slowed down and switched from self-bashing to the, more positive, self-talk. I find it ironic that 18 months later, it still feels like my life is slipping away from me (only in a new way). I suppose that I just need to continue the self-talk to get through the hard times - where simple things like breathing are difficult.

Posted by Juls at 2:06 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)

One of the reasons why Saturday's run was challenging was that my left knee was hurting. It began around mile 7 and lasted well into the week. Okay, so it is only Tuesday, but feels like a long time. I don't have time to mess around with injuries.

I made an appointment for a torture session with Kris, my favorite sports massage therapist. She also happens to be one of the TNT coaches. In the past, Kris has worked on my feet and lower legs, as well as my low back following a rear-ender. She has worked many a miracle, but she is also good for telling you to back off if needed. I was hoping that she would not be prescribing a break from running.

The appointment began innocently with the usual poking and prodding, as well as movements designed to test for the various knee ailments. Finally, with my legs extended out straight, she determined that my left leg was higher than my right (even though the actual length of my legs was equal). She rolled me onto my right side and began working on my left lateral thigh.

I writhed in pain, gritted my teeth, and whimpered until she finally gave me a stress ball to squeeze. "I thought that you said that you were using the foam roller," she said with surprise. She added, "I am barely using pressure." Apparently, I needed lessons in foam rolling techniques for the purpose of self-inflicted pain. I was not doing it correctly.

I also learned that I need to train my gluts to join the team, and help my knees and ankles more. This is a polite way of telling me that I have a lazy ass.

Of all of the past visits, Kris has never hurt me so good. I went straight from the table, to the stretching room, and then into the ice bath to numb the effects. I left with a new list of exercises, stretches, and foam rolling moves to add to my daily activities. Let me just say that I hope to have buns of steel in a few weeks.

Continue reading "My Lazy Ass" »

Posted by Juls at 9:23 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)

If you got a glimpse of the comments from my last post, you’ll see a little nudge from my Big Sis. “Quit whining and just run,” she says. *sigh* and then the lecturing begins. “Really, you shouldn't...” *roll eyes* Big Sis’ comments have always been a mixed bag for me. They are the product many years of experience, paired with a whole lot of love for me. Even though her comments aren’t always well taken, I know the fact that they are well meaning to be true. My sister loves me, and I love her.

Still, I can't resist jabbing back a little bit. II began my reply with, “Am I going to have to block your comments from my site?” Of course, I was joking. I went on to affirm, “I meant to point out that if you don't do the preventative measures like ice baths, foam rolling, recovery drink/meals, stretching, cross-training the next day, etc....you will pay for it.” Then, came the jab. I prodded her a bit, “Sound familiar?”

After my punchy explanation, I went on to the real reason for my grumpiness. I wrote, “And what's up with that potty comment.” Indeed, I knew exactly why she had made included “get there early enough to use the potty” in her comment. Only weeks ago I had written about being late to the long run and falling behind the group. Then there was the post where I mentioned needing a bio-break during my solo time trial. *another sigh* Can’t we just forget about that?

Apparently, I am sensitive about the whole pee thing. Especially given a recent experience that comes later in this post. It isn't just Big Sis who has noticed my short comings. Last weekend, Lil Sis casually mentioned that she, AND HER FRIEND, wondered how many times I had to stop during my half-marathon to go potty. Huh? Okay, I did duck into the bushes to pee when Lil Sis and I were out running together. Haven’t we all had to do that at one time or another. I can think of many a running blog where elimination issues have been discussed, but my family only reads *my* blog. I therefore had reservations about writing about my latest experience on this very topic.

[pause to think]

Continue reading "Potty Training" »

Posted by Juls at 5:48 PM | Permalink

Tonight’s track workout should be interesting given the amount of residual soreness that I am experiencing. My quads are fried.

Although I would normally embrace the challenge, the thought of hill repeats is not at all appealing to me right now. In preparation, I am doing my best to move around, inflict pain through self massage (via foam rolling and needing my leg like a mound of pizza dough), do the dynamic stretching taught in our TNT workouts, and Rx (ibuprofen & arnica). I almost forgot hydration. Hang on; I’ll be right back. *head up the stairs for “good” water by the executive offices*

You may find it puzzling why a 12.4 mile trail run at an easy pace was more damaging than a 13.1 mile race. It is true that the trail “run” was seriously hard with ascents and descents that sometimes lead to expletives spewing from my mouth. This type of language is typically reserved for driving only. “Sweetness and light” folks; that is my attempted impression. Let me clue you in to some other possible etiologies for my severe case of DOMS.

The list of “Should haves”:
Stretching post run: Didn’t happen.
Recovery drink: Didn’t happen. I did enjoy the post-run soup, and snacks provided by PCTR.
Ice bath: Didn’t happen. Apparently, ice melts when mixed with warm water.
Ibuprofen: Didn’t happen. The ibuprofen was down stairs and I just wanted to take a nap.
Foam rolling: Didn’t happen. Again, I just wanted a nap.
Nap: Didn’t happen either. I just lay there with my eyes closed.

On Sunday morning, I got out of bed and nearly fell to the ground in shock. OUCH! By this point, I was unable to manage any of the the foam roller self-massage techniques, and stretching was futile. I tried to institute some of the recommended treatments but had very little success in the movement category. It is true; I have developed quite a talent maneuvering the stairs (crawling up the stairs on four extremities, or 3, if coffee is in my hand) during bouts of extreme soreness. I suspect that my limited movement did not aid my recovery. Even the dogs’ walks were cut short.

On Monday, I attempted to use my foam roller again. The pain felt worse than on Sunday, by the way, and I was not very successful in my attempts to “roll” out the muscle soreness. I did start my intake of ibuprofen, but I was not successful in doing any cross training. I blame this on work, even though I could have gone to the gym after my extra long work day.

As of 2 pm today, the soreness is finally starting to resolve. I’ve got 4 more hours until T-time.

Posted by Juls at 1:42 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)

I have been making strides to get back to my old running self.  Unfortunately, my body has been reminding me there is one component in that statement that might cause a problem.  "Old" hasn't exactly been working to my advantage these days.

That left ankle of mine, the one that I sprained in January, has been ensuring that I take my time returning to the road.  After a 6 mile hilly run yesterday, my ankle has been aching and urging me to take today off.  My training hasn't even started, yet I've already drug out my arnica and ice pack.

*sigh*

This isn't going to be easy. 

Posted by Juls at 7:50 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

I suppose it is a good thing that the weekend is upon us. My mind is moving too fast for me to follow. I am restless and can’t seem to focus on my work. I am disappointed to find that only a few minutes have passed whenever I check the clock at the bottom right of my computer screen.

I don’t know why I am so anxious for the weekend to come. The weekend proves to be another test of my endurance. To top that point, another rain storm is due to hit with high winds that will further threaten the leaning fence. Can’t a California girl like me enjoy a sunny weekend?

I think back to earlier in the week when I sat poolside, at the gym, watching YaYa swim in the pool. He seems to have lost his form where his freestyle stroke is concerned. He wiggles through the water like a little tadpole. I wonder if we’ll spend any time wiggling through the water, pedaling in place, or running to nowhere this weekend. It might just be the thing to sooth my restlessness.

Posted by Juls at 2:48 PM | Permalink

It has been a little disappointing that my ankle has taken so long to fully heal.  I've tried it out a couple of times. 

While out running with Ronin (the first time running since my injury as well as running with him) I was not aware of any soreness until afterward.  I let a bit of time pass before I tried again.  In the meantime, I focused on my ankle strengthening exercises. 

The second time, my run was on the treadmill.  I managed to get two sluggish, out of breath, painful miles completed.  The pain (only when trying to pick up the pace) was certainly a sign that I need to let more time pass.  Being out of breath was a sign that I have lost fitness.  Even the heart rate reading (181 beats per minute) confirmed this fact.  Although it has always been on the high side, I was disappointed to see it so high at a speed of only 6.5 mph.

I have been reluctant to try again.  The cycle bores me to pieces.  I mean, it's one thing to be running and going nowhere, but to pedal and go nowhere is just wrong.  It doesn't even feel natural.  In the pool, I can feel my ankle twinge when I do the frog kick (breast stroke).  Fortunately, I hate breast stroke, so it isn't a problem. 

Continue reading "Physical challenges to achieving relaxation" »

Posted by Juls at 10:22 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I couldn't remember the last time I ran.  Then, as I wiggled my foot against the bed linens, my ankle reminded me.  The last time that I ran, I'd twisted my ankle and fell down.  That put an end to any hope of finishing the Napa Marathon.  The ankle is still tenuous, but doing much better.

I haven't just been sitting on my butt though.  This week, I've been getting out at lunchtime to do some brisk walking.  It feels good to move and my ankle is handling it fairly well. 

I've also been taking out my aggressions on BoBo's punching bag.  After all, if 1/2 of my garage (slight exaggeration) is going to be taken over by the beastly object, it might as well be put to use.  So YaYa and I have been taking turns beating up on the thing.

It's not much, but the physical activity is doing a lot of good. 

Posted by Juls at 9:35 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

I was pissed when I left my support group on Wednesday.  Pissed - Because the facilitator came on a little too strong with her comments on what I should do about BoBo.  She's never even met him.

I am really fed up with the number of people who are willing to give their free advice on how I should be parenting and what I should be doing.  While I admit that I need to make some changes, I fear that any rash actions on my part may push BoBo in the opposite direction.  I also feel overwhelmed and paralyzed by the thought of adding more to my already full plate. 

What I need to do is take better care of ME.  I'm not suggesting that I sit on the couch eating bon-bons while my son gets lost in a cloud of smoke.  I'm just finally admitting that my body has been letting me know that I need to care for it better.

My throat has been sore since at least Christmas.  Sometimes the pain is mild.  Other times it hurts bad enough that I get up in the wee hours to drink a cup of hot tea.  I have been feeling like the weight of the world is upon me as well.  On my chest to be exact.  Perhaps it's just stress, but I am too young to feel this way.  So, today saw the doctor and had many tests done.

If you want to help, put some skin in the game; don't tell me what you think I should be doing or tell me how mad you are at BoBo for putting me through this.  Push aside your judgement and think for a moment what you might do if your Dad died when you were a teenager.  And don't call someone else to tell them what they need to do for me either. 

Posted by Juls at 12:12 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

The following message just arrived in my email in-box.

Dear Julie:

Thank you for your email.  We are sorry you will not be joining us on the March 1st weekend for the 30th annual Napa Valley Marathon.

Posted by Juls at 1:30 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

For sanity sake, I gave my crutches the boot. I found it impossible to accomplish anything with both of my hands tied up. Making my coffee and then balancing on one leg in the kitchen until the cup was finished seemed counterproductive to the healing process. Additionally, the large and energetic puppy posed a real safety issue.

Although I would still be weight bearing, I reasoned that my boot would provide the immobilization that my ankle needed. It also feels satisfying to get another use out of it, thereby getting my money's worth from the investment. Note: By no means does this mean that I want another reason to use it after this; I can do without ANOTHER injury.

After a day off of work, I am back in the office. I am currently working (or was working) in my office doing a little desk yoga; my foot is propped up on a cushion on top of my desk. It is nice to be flexible.

Posted by Juls at 10:46 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)

This morning, when I was trying to make up for time lost...do to useless trips downstairs...where I accomplished absolutely nothing, my youngest son put me in my place. Yes, my 9-year-old scolded me - gently of course.
I guess I was being a bit inpatient with him. I was also complaining a little too much...about having to do too many things (which I wasn't exactly doing very well, by the way). That was when he told me that "just because I was having a bad day [because of the crutches] didn't mean that I needed to ruin his day too." He said other things too, such as that I wasn't doing EVERYTHING, and reminding me that he *was* helping me.

It's true - ALL of it. I was scolded by a 9-year-old and I deserved it.

Posted by Juls at 11:10 AM | Permalink | Comments (4)

I am finding out the hard way that it is really HARD to get things done with crutches. I'm not good at the impaired mobility thing. Then again, we already knew that.

On the upside, I have a great friend who helped me get dinner on the table last night. I also have a wonderfully helpful son who helped carry my purse and open doors for me yesterday as we chased down the reason for BoBo's back pain.

Also, good news (I think) nothing is broken of fractured. It's just a sprain.

Posted by Juls at 8:59 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

The biopsy revealed a "Ruptured keratin cyst."
Translation: I am healthy!

Posted by Juls at 11:24 PM | Permalink | Comments (12)

On the outside, I was calm. On the inside, however, I was haunted by the slight possiblity that my breast lump was not the benign sebacous cyst after all. A few months ago it was as small as the head of an eraser, but it has since more than tripled in size and gotten infected as well.

I lay on the guerny listening to the mix of conversations from the holding area. The guy in the next area moans every now and again. The lady across the way trys to track down her son to communicate one last bit of information.

I hold my right arm straight out, careful not to bend it in fear that I'll need a new one placed if it goes bad before my procedure. It hurts already, or still; I can't figure out which it is. I examine it and check the IV flow. It appears to be okay.

The hospital is a cold place. I don't know how I could have forgotten that after working in one for over 12 years. I have two blankets over my but I am ice cold. I curl my body up and try to stay warm as I wait.

Continue reading "The waiting game" »

Posted by Juls at 2:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (9)

After struggling through my mid-week runs, I finally had a run where I didn’t feel like I was struggling. While riffling through my workout bag, I thought about my previous considerations in relation to my running...

My working heart rate has returned to the high numbers that I experienced prior to beginning my string of musical blood pressure meds. This has been the case since changing to a new medication in the week before Chicago. Initially, I was glad to see my heart rate move out of the slow zone that was the result of the BETA blocker. My heart rate was too low when I would run and, as a result, my legs felt dead. I knew that I couldn't get to Boston on one cylinder.

After making the change, I was disappointed that my heart rate was not back in the range that it was when I was taking the first ACE inhibitor. That zone was the perfect zone; that zone was where I noticed that I was hitting my target paces regularly. Instead, it was back to an average heart rate of the high 160s to 170s. I may have been used to that before, but now it is just hard.

Having finally experienced a “good” run is a step in the right direction. But “long run pace” is quite different from “race pace” or that required for my intervals. Thankfully, CIM is a couple of months away. I have a bit of time to figure it out. In the meantime, I have a lot of unanswered questions and no one to consult but the Magic Eight Ball (M8B) that was in my workout bag.

YaYa was still in the bathroom when I found the ball in my bag. It was a freebie that I picked up at my last job.

Continue reading "The "M8B" Q & A Session" »

Posted by Juls at 4:25 PM | Permalink | Comments (8)

My body is trying to roll with the punches, go with the flow, adjust and recover from my late night of watching our local football team get creamated and then wait until 11 pm for the train to take us home. It's 10:40 am and my body is still waking up.

I haven't been eager to get out for today's run. Yesterday's run (8 miles) felt awful. I hoping that my body will do better with the lower heartrate (that's how the BETA blockers lower blood pressure).

I'm now dressed in my running apparal. My cytomax is mixed up. Now, I just have to generate a little more enthusiasm and courage to get out there.

Please send me good vibes for a safe run. Technically, I'm already tapering. It's only 18 miles. Yippee!

Posted by Juls at 10:40 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Here's the deal. I've noticed a tight feeling in my throat for a couple weeks now. I couldn't actually pinpoint when it started; it's been more intense on some days. But recently, the feeling has been more intense, more consistent. I've been trying to figure out the cause but it was a guessing game until now.

I woke up and noticed that my throat felt normal. It was clearly different from what I've been feeling. When the kids were taking their medications, I began to wonder if my ACE inhibitorcould be the cause. I wondered and then dismissed the idea because I've been on this medicaiton for a while. Sure, I've gone up on the dose recently, but the timing of the increased dose did not coincide with the throat issue. I took my pill, along with my allergy pill. Soon after, we were out the door.

It was about 30 minutes later that I noticed the urge to have something hot to drink. I had not made my latte at home so I would have to pay for a latte if I stopped. I didn't care. By the time I had my drink in hand I was well into my throat clearing habit. By the time I hit the freeway, I was coughing. It was pretty obvious - the ACE inhibitor is not agreeing with me.

All day I wondered why the symptoms would start now. I tried to convince myself that going outside started up my seasonal allergies. But, even indoors, the feeling continued. By lunch, I felt miserable enough to skip my run. Then I had a realization.

Before now, I wasn't aware of the tightening in my throat because, until I missed a dose over the weekend, I used to take my medication as night. A-ha!

Continue reading "The ABC's start with "A"" »

Posted by Juls at 5:52 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

I'm a little stiff this morning, compliments of another shift in long run scheduling. My low back is probably the stiffest area. I attribute my lack of soreness to having stretched at every red light that stopped my forward movement. I would guess that having my long runs in the double digits for an extended period of time played its part as well.

Although I am guessing that there isn's a whole lot of folks who go long on Friday nights, it was a nice change for me.

Takin' it to the streets
I started out just past 4 pm from my front step. The planned distance was 20 miles. I knew that I wouldn't have time for it all before I'd be due to pick YaYa up from daycare. I had wanted to go earlier but I had to raise a stink at the Women's Imaging Department regarding a mammogram that appeared to have gone AWOL. By the time I returned from the clinic I needed my run in a bad way.

The stress from the whole breast lump ordeal was now hitting again. I'd been good at finding the positive aspects of the situation all week. The ultrasound had not found anything alarming. I only needed the final mammogram results to confirm that my "lump" was a normal, but different, tissue type. I grabbed myPod for some distraction during my run.

I did not head for the trail. Instead, I ventured out in the opposite direction. The sun shone bright, but there was a cool breeze blowing. I tried to let the music take me, like it used to, but the songs have since been over played. I enjoyed listening, but I remained on my own for pace management. My guess is that Coach would prefer it that way.

The run took me into new territory. It was exciting but felt safe as there was plenty of traffic on the roads. I looped down (off the street) and into a local park for a few miles and then returned in the direction of home to get YaYa.

Continue reading "Takin' it to the streets" »

Posted by Juls at 7:47 AM | Permalink | Comments (15)

I remember when Tom and I first saw the sunken tub in the master bathroom of our new home. The golden facet and handles sparkled. I imagined romance and candles in my future.

Now, I look to one corner to find Batman and Robin in a tangled mess. In the other corner of the tub is an army tank and a police car. The bad guys are no where to be seen. I wonder if they won or lost the most recent battle with the evil bathtub villains.

Evil villains are like that; they are in-your-face scary one moment and virtually invisible the next. A superhero must always be ready to fight. Even if you see no evil, it doesn't mean that it isn't there. You must be sure before you can let your guard down.

So we wait , Batman, Robin and I, for the evil villains to show their face. If and when they do, we *will* attack. Until then, I'll just relax and enjoy a little peace.

Posted by Juls at 7:50 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

My 3:30 pm interview is the last thing on my mind. Still, I have pulled up the company website to study up on the their pipeline. They have some exciting technologies in development. I can almost let myself get excited. As I familiarize myself with their products, my mind wanders. I just can't seem to stay focused.

Instead, I focus on the time. I watch as the minutes, and hours, tick away. I am waiting for a different call.

Armed with a phone number for the radiology department, I set out to repair an error made in my mammogram scheduling. The appointment should have been scheduled at the same facility as the biopsy appointment. It should have included an ultrasound. Instead, I had my boobs squished and was left to worry the weekend away about whether the film-based views would be available to the treating physician. My goal of moving up my biopsy appointment was now hindered by the fact that my ultrasound appointment is not until later this week. To complicate things, I have discovered that the ultrasound cannot be done without the mammogram films.

In the attempts to move up the ultrasound appointment, I've volunteered to pick them up myself and take them to my appointment. The only problem is that I can't find out if the radiologist is done with them yet. As of several hours ago, there as an appointment for ultrasound tomorrow. Unfortunately, I cannot get booked into that appointment spot until the guy at the other radiology department verifies that I can pick up my films today.

So I wait. Impatiently, I might add.

Continue reading "Waiting" »

Posted by Juls at 1:37 PM | Permalink | Comments (10)

Repeat after me:
I'm doing well.
Good?
Yeah, I AM DOING good.

Okay, I am NOT convinced. Is this why I was fighting back the tears as I tried to complete the stupid health questionnaire at today's appointment?

Well, I *was* doing well - until I was given their list of questions.

It began with the marital status question. Married or Single? Which am I? Lucky for me, they provided a line. I wrote down widowed. I turned the paper over and began circling the Yes or No responses. I was only half way through the questions when my name was called. Awkwardly, I followed the aide - holding a nearly full latte and trying to finish the questions before she asked for the paper.

Do you often feel sad or depressed? This is a stupid question. I mumbled, Of course I'm sad; my husband died. Luckily, the aide didn't quite hear me. I stared at the Yes or No boxes and remembered how Tom said it was bad to have "depression" on your medical record. I skipped to the next question. Do you sometimes lose interest in things that previously brought you pleasure? Another *stupid* question. I thought of my running and triumphantly circled No.

I felt like I was on a roll when I was asked to step on the scale. *ugh* I stepped off and had my blood pressure checked next. *sigh* I wasn't surprised when the aide noted that my blood pressure was elevated. No kidding. Next question. If you are sexually active, do you use a form protection to prevent the transmission of sexually transmitted diseases? This was also a stupid question. I lined through the Yes or No responses and wrote N/A. *sigh*

Continue reading "NOT Convinced" »

Posted by Juls at 4:06 PM | Permalink | Comments (16)

It was a beautiful day. But I stayed indoors to assess the new orthotic set up. I thought about bringing myPod along to distract me from the monontony of running on the treadmill. He hasn't had much activity lately - only playing the YaYa Hall interview for me on my drive to work earlier this week.

But today, distraction was the last thing that I needed. I would only have this one run to evaluate whether I should wear my orthotics with the new metatarsal pad setup was working. I at least needed to figure out if they were working enough use them in the Kaiser Permanente Half Marathon this Sunday.

Continue reading "What next?" »

Posted by Juls at 3:26 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

"Change can be good" or so they say. "They" being the upper management of my company and the mother company. I've been done resisting for quite sometime. I am just hoping that the changes will settle into something that we can call the new improved way we do things.

On another note, I have changed my shoes three times today, and three times yesterday. It is time for a something to change besides my shoes. As I sat in the waiting room of the podiatry department at Kaiser, I hoped for a change to my feet challenges. I am tired of the ongoing experimentation where one problem is solved and other is born. That has how it has seemed since I came out of my boot therapy.

While the discomfort has varied and is never enough to stop me from running, it is a sign of an ongoing issue. In the process of experimentation, I have tried many different insoles alone and in various combinations. From the cuboid area to the ball of the foot, and from the ball of the foot to the heel the discomfort has shifted around my foot like a corn kernels in a hot pot.

My appointment wasn't exactly what I was expecting, or hoping. I have yet to discover if this was a good or bad thing. Basically, the doctor and I talked for a bit. She watched me walk down the hall and back a couple of times.

After examining how my bare feet move with walking, the doctor told me to try my old custom orthotics (with an addition that I will discuss in a minute). I had quit using these orthotics after they began feeling like they were flattening out. They just didn't seem to be as supportive as before. I had queried the sales representative on how many miles until the orthotics needed replacing. They had taken me through the training for 4 marathons already. The rep told me that he recommended that I have my feet rescanned for a new fit because "feet change". At that time I decided to try over the counter (OTC) insoles. I wasn't anxious to fork over another $250 for a new pair. It seemed to work...until now.

Continue reading "Change" »

Posted by Juls at 7:28 PM | Permalink

I was less than lady like as I sat at my desk rapidly shoveling my chicken salad into my mouth. With back-to-back meetings scheduled through my lunch hour, I barely got to the cafeteria on time to get something to eat. To add to the Monday stressors, I had less than 30 minutes before the next meeting and plenty to do to prepare for it.

*sigh*

It's going to be a tough week. I have full day training on Tuesday and Wednesday. Somehow, I have to figure out who will pick up BoBo from baseball practice (should he survive today's final cut). It's a problem that I am happy to have because I'd love to see him play on the high school team.

In addition to the child pickup issue, I have to figure out when I will do my runs. If coach is okay with me doing them on the treadmill, I can fight for a treadmill in the evenings at the local YMCA. I'll have to figure out how I can escape the "30 minute time limit if others are waiting" rule. Running in circles on a well-lit track may be a better option for Wednesday's slightly longer run.

Today is a day of rest where exercise is involved. My feet remain happy after yesterday's "experiment." I am back to giving both feet equal treatment. When I put one foot in the ice water, the other goes in too. They stick together so that there is no argument later that I am giving preferential treatment to one and not the other. It's hard to keep everyone happy these days. I'll just do my best.

Posted by Juls at 1:57 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)

On Saturday I thought a lot about my latest shoe issues: It seems that the size of running shoes, which I have been wearing for the past few years are now... well...short. I don't know what is happening exactly. It seems like my foot is flattening out without my old insoles and subsequently taking up more space in my shoe. I see the podiatrist again on February 1st, but in the meantime, my feet just aren't happy. I feel pressure on my bones bilaterally; my feet want cushion. The heels of my feet feel like I need to dig a divot in the current insoles. The fact is that I really miss my old insoles.

I paid a visit to my local running store. Tim agreed that my toe was a little close to the end of my shoe. He pulled some size 9 1/2 shoes off the shelf and I slipped them on. The felt okay, but a little loose in the toe box. Rather than running on the store treadmill, he had me run in front of the store. I heard the shoes slapping the sidewalk. When I turned to run back, Tim had a funny look on his face.

He hooked his video recorder up to the TV to show me what he had seen. In the video, my feet were landing in turnout fashion. I suppose this would be great if I was doing ballet, but not running. Tim said that no matter what shoes he put me in, that he could not fix the cause of my feet landing this way. "It's not your feet," he indicated (not his exact words), "it's up higher like your hips or core."

This was not what I wanted to hear (or see). I realize that it is just one video of one short little trip down the sidewalk. It is in no way confirmation of a "problem." *sigh* But, I thought, it could be. I need more video of me running. I need to be running my regular pace, and in running clothes rather than with my jeans rolled up. Then maybe, I could determine if it was just me trying to accommodate the bunched up pants between my knees or a problem that needs looking into.

Either way, I find it puzzling. I was doing fine before. So, I had a little over-use issue. It seems that the taking out of the insoles that I loved created a serious of unhappiness in my feet. I was tempted to give them another try, and that is just what I did today.

Continue reading "The experiment" »

Posted by Juls at 5:38 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Mark (aka the running blogfather) posted on the run that wouldn't end. Sadly, I had a similar experience.

There were too many things going against me:
Fairly early in the run, I felt the inner edge of my shoe insole rubbing against my foot. Of course it would have to be my right foot. "Oh shoot," I thought. I'd felt this same thing yesterday but had since forgotten it. My encounter with the road rage momma pushed my plans to cross train right out of my awareness. I stopped at my turn around spot and tried readjusting my insole.

On the way back, the rubbing continued. I sensed that I was avoiding pronation because of it. My "twinge" had returned and was now progressing towards "pain."

But that wasn't enough; nature was calling (or rather "yelling"). I could not afford to walk. I trudged onward until I hit the bathroom.

I moved my insoles around again putting my sorbothane layer under the stock shoe insole. My foot thanked me. But the damage had, apparently, been done. My foot was not happy when I slipped back into my work shoes that house the hard Foot Max orthotics.

I could blame it on the full moon, or I could take it as a sign that I need a day off.
Tomorrow, I will rest.

Posted by Juls at 3:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

With my working from home today, for YaYa and my doctor appointments, I was on email early this morning. I was pleasantly surprised as the comments from the blog-o-sphere began rolling in. There have been many of you have continued logging onto my blog during my down time from running. I really appreciate the continued interest and encouragement during my stay on the injured list.

For those who were 1st to offer comments on my most recent posting, Thank you so much. This means you: Dori of She Do Run Run, 21st Century Mom, Waddler 26.2, and Jeff of Time to Run. I appreciate EVERYONE's encouragement as I make my way back on the road to my BQ. Although Boston Qualification feels farther away then ever, I know in my heart, that I *will* get there someday.

In the meantime, I am looking forward to feeling the wind blowing in my face, my ponytail swinging to the beat of my running tunes, and feeling the exhilarating rush of making it to the top of the BIG hill at my favorite open space preserve. I am even looking forward to getting drenched with rain while out on a long run. I realize that I am jumping ahead of myself, having only logged 1 real run so far; still I am enjoying "looking forward".

Posted by Juls at 9:42 AM | Permalink | Comments (4)

This morning, I made the decision to go boot-free since my 3 weeks were "technically" done. Yesterday, I started back on the exercises and stretches that my physical therapist had prescribed a month ago. This time around, it actually feels good. My ankle and foot are gradually getting used to being free from the boot. The stiffness is easing up, and the stabilization musculature is coming back. I think that I am on the right track ; I am on the road to recovery...finally.

Posted by Juls at 6:28 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)

I was sitting at my desk, torn on what to do for physical activity. The outdoors was calling to me. My workout bag sat in the nearby chair. I had options.

My tentative plan was to "try" to make the water running class this evening. I knew that in all likelihood, it would not happen. Not only is it not convenient to home, but the childcare is only open until 7 pm on Friday. The water running class goes until 7:25 pm. If YaYa's leg wasn't in a cast still, he could be in pool with BoBo for recreational swim. It is in the other part of the same pool as my class and has a lifeguard.

With the childcare issue, I was back in the boat of needing some sort of physical activity. Anything. But what? What's a girl to do?

As I mentioned yesterday, my transition back to running had a set back. There was a residual "twinge" that I was feeling whenever my foot flexed past a certain point. I had felt this same "twinge" when I would stretch my foot in the morning during the past couple of days. I had been doing well, so I was puzzled.

What was the change? I thought back on the week.

Continue reading "What's a girl to do?" »

Posted by Juls at 8:27 PM | Permalink

Well it is November 30th, the last day of the month, and the last day of my commitment to NaBloPoMo. It isn't as hard to post daily when nobody is expecting it. It *is* challenging, however, to post everyday when you know that it is expected of you.

Oh the pressure, and I wasn't even an official participant. NOT official, and therefore not eligible for valuable prizes. So, I hope you won't mind that I gave myself a little award. *sheepish grin*

The NaBloPoMo was sort of a survival game. Survival of the fittest, and I survived. *whew*

Continue reading "Survival of the fittest" »

Posted by Juls at 8:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

I stepped up on the starting blocks, a young girl ready to take the plunge against other girls my age. Be it free style, breaststroke, or butterfly, I was always nervous. I suppose we all were. Many times a body or two would land in the water before the gun actually went off. A false start. We all would regroup and wait again for the timing to be right. "Timers and judges ready, swimmers take your marks..."

I had my own false start this week. It was a plunge of sorts, but not into the pool. My false start was not in swimming, but rather in the sport of running. I found myself having to regroup today when the 'mill just didn't feel right. Cindy calls it a "niggle" - whatever it was the "tug" or "pull" or "owie" in my foot just didn't feel right.

I did some time on the recumbent bike, but was unhappy for the entire time. Later tonight I found my way to the pool at the not-so-close to home YMCA. The gun went off in my head. It was time to swim. So I did. The first many laps of swimming felt tiring. I could tell that it had been a long time since I did any serious time in the pool.

I shared the lane with two other swimmers, but the match up wasn't quite right. After a bit, one of the swimmers dropped off, leaving just two of us struggling to get the timing right. The other swimmer let me pass him at the wall just as the first guy was stopping. A couple of laps later and he was gone too. I found my groove and settled into it.

It was feeling pretty good. Forty laps done, and thirty-two to go. Suddenly I was sharing my lane with four kids. *sigh* It was time for the swim team to practice. My swim was re-routed to the indoor pool where I finished off the mile that I set out to do.

I must say that even though my running had a false start, I finally felt like I actually had a workout worth mentioning - ffor the first time in months.

Posted by Juls at 9:09 PM | Permalink

In preparation for my trip to my favorite running store, I did a little jog while out with the Lucky dog. I wanted to be sure that I would be able to complete the video analysis in each shoe that I was going to try. The little run with the dog made for a happy dog. Well, he was happy until we returned him to the house and then drove away in the van.

Dr. M (my podiatrist) had wanted me to make some changes to my running shoes. Her recommendations to put me in a different shoe allowing more pronation were questioned by me. Chris and Tim both agreed.

My current shoe was chosen for good reason. It's true that the black and gray version of the same shoe probably caused the whole problem, but my Burgundy version, that they originally put me in, has never given me issues. We both thought that removing the Stable Trac Insole would probably do enough to allow the movement that she wanted. Still, I was going along with the recommendation to run in a road shoe.

Tim worked with me today. He started me out in a totally neutral shoe. He put me on the treadmill and videotaped my feet. When he played it back, the results were ugly. I pronated so much that it hurt to watch the video clip. Next, he tried me in the road version of my current shoe. This shoe offers light stability which, without the added insole, was a prettier sight. Finally, Tim put me in an Asiacs road shoe that also offered light stability (a little less that the other). I compared the two and was happier in the Brooks.

By the time I got home from the store it was nearly 11 am. I had been boot-free all morning and this made for some tired dogs. Who let the dogs out?

Oh yeah, it was me. They didn't get very far, but my shoes will be ready for when they are able to. For now, it's time to boot them up again.

Continue reading "Who let the dogs out?" »

Posted by Juls at 11:13 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)

This post was for 21st Century Mom, who asked if I was sneaking foot freedom or if I had permission.

My appointment with Podiatry was made prior to my doctor returning from her emergency trip. Although I suspected that it should have been, the appointment was never cancelled.

I knew that the boot confinement date was nearly two weeks away. Since I had many questions, I thought that I could make good use of the time and $15 co-pay. I was also looking forward to an updated assessment.

My doctor walked into the room. I could tell that she feared my return was because the boot wasn't helping me. Her smile widened when I told her that I felt great, although I had not traveled more than a few steps without the boot. As far as I could tell my foot was getting better.

My doctor wasn't surprised that I wanted to do some transitioning; she seemed surprised that I was asking.

Cautiously, I asked, "Can I try water running again...or walking....or anything else?"
"Sure," she said, "I would."

Then she told me that she would also look into my current running shoe. She said to tell the running store that I had an overuse injury on the outside of my foot. She wanted me in a running shoe/orthotic combination that didn't restrict my foot from pronating. She stressed that this is opposite of what you would think, but insisted that it was the right recommendation. She then told me to walk in the new running shoes. "Wear the boot for most of the day, but begin transitioning out of it," she clarified.

I'll see her again on the 1st of December. She said to see what the foot would "allow" me to do between now and then.

"Maybe you just be walking. Maybe you'll have run one, two, or even three miles by then."
I may need custom orthotics if I can't get off my cuboid bone, but that will be the next step.

Until then...

Continue reading "Permission Granted" »

Posted by Juls at 8:04 AM | Permalink | Comments (7)

One by one, the velcro straps ripped away from the boot sock. As the foot was released, it quietly thought yipee. It did not want to rejoice loadly, fearing that it would be sent back immediately. Instead, the foot quietly slid into the running shoe to go for a short walk.

It was happy, and yet it felt strange to be able to move freely. The foot wasn't sure if it remembered how to move correctly. One step at a time...slowly...it took the body for a walk around the block. It was happy for it's chance to prove to itself that it still worked. It was also happy to return to the safety of the boot a short time later.

Posted by Juls at 6:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)

I had worked so diligently to get my weight and fitness in order during this past year. Being on Jenny Craig for the first time in over 10 years, was a definate change in my eating habits. It was ever-challenging trying to lose weight as my marathon training was accellerating to "full steam ahead" mode. I was ready for my 1st, of two, 20 mile runs when my injury hit. I had lost about 7 pounds by that point, but my weight had been hovering at that point for several weeks.

Since my injury, my weight had remained stable. I had backed off on the JC plan, eating more meals with the family than not. I continued to watch my portion size and tried to avoid the danger foods. Regardless of my efforts, chips and salsa "moments of weakness" do happen. Dark chocolate still happens too; while exercise rarely does.

I still weigh myself on most mornings, prior to returning the leg to the boot. My weight has been creeping downward ever so slowly. As of today, I've lost 10 pounds in total since July. While I want to rejoice at the number, I know deep down that the loss includes some muscle loss. *sigh* I am happy that I am not gaining weight.

I did some abdominal strengthening yesterday prior to booting up. I had planned to use the rowing machine at the YMCA in the nearby town (where BoBo was going to play with the friends that he made prior to us moving from there 2 years ago). Alas, my discovery of YaYa's lingering, or rather "returning", ankle problems put a stop to that.

What's a girl to do? I could do the obvious things like clean my house again, read more of the Memory Keeper's Daughter, walk the dog, or perhaps get a jump on my holiday shopping. *sigh* All of these ideas, except the final one, are good options. But 1st, I think I will eat some breakfast.

Posted by Juls at 9:09 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)

It was a sad morning in our house. YaYa woke up and was clearly limping. He had started limping last night when he returned from the neighbor's house. He'd been running (with doctor permission) and I figured that it was too much - too soon. This morning I thought it would be back to normal. He said that his ankle didn't hurt but something was not right. In addition to this, he had a stomach ache. Poor guy.

Because of the moving office, I was home from work again. The movers didn't want the employees in their way and slowing down their work. Because of this, and it being a teacher in-service day, I had the option to take it slow. It was only after I stopped in to give his teacher some papers that he mentioned having twisted his ankle while running across the neighbor's lawn last night.

Well, he sort of mentioned it; as soon as he said it, he tried to take it back.
"It didn't happen", he insisted, "I was only dreaming."
Dreaming? He slept well, but this was certainly one BAD dream.

I wanted to believe that it had only been a bad dream. I couldn't take the chance though. He was crying when we returned to the van instead of me dropping him off at daycare. We dropped off BoBo, and then went straight to the Orthopedics Department. I didn't have an appointment for him and they were short handed due to some yearly conference that most of the Orthopods were attending.

Continue reading "One BAD Dream" »

Posted by Juls at 1:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I slept without the boot last night. The doctor had told me that I could, but I have continued to wear it to bed because I usually get up at least once in the middle of the night. But last night I decided that I would just have to make it through the whole night because my foot needed a break. It was nice not having to avoid my side because of the bars on the side of the boot. I slept comfortably for the first time in many days.

With the boot off, I turned onto my side. My right foot found it's mate, and the pair snuggled up close to eachother. I fell asleep soon after that.

I was thankful that I had the option of removing my boot. I thought of YaYa, who had on his hard cast all of this time. He wasn't given the option to take off his cast at any point so that he could get a better night sleep, or to scratch or wash his foot. I guess I should be thankful for that.

Tonight, however, it is YaYa who is enjoying the luxury of being freed from his cast. He wore his cast for four full weeks. Now, he is peacefully lying on his side. His body is curled ever so slightly, and his feet cuddled up to eachother. He told me that he has "happy feet".

They are happy because now they are CLEAN - you should have seen the stuff that got inside of his cast. Oh, and the smell was pretty bad too.

Posted by Juls at 9:54 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

I am a little slow to these days. I blame it all on my running injury, but that excuse doesn't really work for my brain functioning slowly. My point?

Well, I totally missed this National Post A Month thing that I finally discovered today thanks to Little Miss Runner Pants. I like the idea of being disciplined enough to post everyday A LOT.

I actually try to post everyday anyhow. Looking back through November, I missed posting on the 6th but posted twice on the 9th. So, even though it is too late to officially be included, I will participate anyhow.

Because, you know that I hate being left out. I already feel like I am missing out on things because of my not running. It is true that I am missing out on Sunday long runs, Yasso Repeats, and Saturday runs at marathon pace, but I am more available for other things...

Continue reading "A Little Slow These Days" »

Posted by Juls at 1:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Look at this thing!
It's huge and it's scary.
YaYa says it's Funny Looking.

This healing injury game is complicated.
My right foot does not hurt when I wear my new boot; however my left leg is starting to hurt.
*sigh*
Now, I need to find a shoe equally as high to balance out my legs.

Continue reading "My Monstrosity" »

Posted by Juls at 7:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

I asked for your comments, didn't I?
*Sigh*

Now, that I have them, I kind of wish that I didn't even ask.

I realize that it is too soon to be considering my next race, but it also gives me hope.
I *need* to have hope.

Continue reading "I Got What I Asked For" »

Posted by Juls at 10:14 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

YaYa is sick. I home from work this morning, and we're sitting here watching Friday Night Lights. In the movie, the star player hurts his knee (torn ACL). He takes 3 weeks off and then the repeat MRI doesn't look any better. His doctor advises him to stay off the field for longer, but he doesn't want anything to do with it. He lies to his coach about his MRI results. He returns to the field and then - bam - takes the hit that ruins any future of playing football ever again.

I won't make that same mistake. But I am looking to the future for my next marathon. I am optimistic of a return to running. Don't worry; I just said "optimistic." I didn't say that I am pony-tailing and suiting up - but I sure do miss it. I am simply looking at the race calendar.

Continue reading "Look to the future" »

Posted by Juls at 8:23 AM | Permalink | Comments (10)

I know that some of you are anxious to know more about how the MRI. Boy, what an experience that was! I had heard about the load noises, but did not know that the tune changes throughout the procedure. I got the pleasure of hearing something similar to the "test of the emergency broadcast system" sound, the fire alarm here at my work, and a sound that was too much like a system error alarm. I only hoped that it was supposed to sound like that, and wasn't an urgent alarm that the MRI was about to blow up.

From my experience as a nurse, I know that it does not take 3-5 days to get the radiology read. As the week progressed, I became anxious to obtain the results.

My efforts to obtain this information have been challenging. I am usually pretty good at working the Kaiser system, but the Podiatry Department has a different set of rules that I just couldn’t get around. In my frustrations, I began to question why I am so good at advocating for my children, and I can't seem to be able to do this for myself. After 5 messages on the various voicemail numbers that I have for Podiatry, as well as speaking to the scheduling desk, I found out that my Podiatrist is in the Operating Room most of the time. I had to get creative in obtaining my MRI results.

Here they are:
Attention to the peroneal tendons, there is very minimal fluid identified, but no evidence of abnormal fluid signal or discontinuity of the peroneal tendons themselves. The anterior and posterior tendons about the ankle similarly without evidence of tear. The calcaneal tendon intact. There is T2 prolonging signal within the anterior aspect of the cuboid bone. This extends approximately 1-1.5 cm. No abnormal soft tissue mass is seen. Ankle mortise is intact without osteochondral lesion. Minimal fluid within the ankle joint.

** IMPRESSION **:
1. Minimal fluid within the peroneal tendon sheaths, _________ associated with tendinitis. There is no definite evidence of tendinous discontinuity or tear.
2. Edema/contusion within the cuboid bone.

When I read the results, I was a bit at a loss for what it could be. I was also relieved that I did not see the word fracture any where in the text. I semi-celebrated and send an email back to say, "So, NO fracture?” just to be sure that I wasn't missing anything.

Continue reading "MRI" »

Posted by Juls at 12:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)

I haven't been doing much lately. It has been a conscious decision to slow down. Most of the day, I resisted the urge to be on my feet. I lounged in bed or on the couch, read the blogs, checked my email accounts, and tried to relax. My efforts to relax did not work. I tried taking a hot shower in the middle of the day. This, also, didn't help me to relax.

After picking BoBo up from the last of three football games (he stayed to watch the two games following his), I announced that I was injured. I felt my kids needed to be reminded. I stated that the house needed to be cleaned and that I could no longer do it alone. I stated that it wasn't even clean enough to bring in a cleaning service to do it for us.

So I began assigning duties. These duties were previously their chores but somehow they got out of actually doing them so they haven't been benefiting from allowance. Today, they would do these chores and more.

BoBo began with sweeping the floors and cleaning the bathroom mirrors and sliding glass doors. YaYa emptied the waste baskets and cleaned the toilets. I know cleaning toilets sounds harsh, but he actually likes this job and I am happy to give it up (even if I have to go behind him and finish up). They both carried their clothing and shoes from the family areas to their rooms and then they cleaned their rooms.

I began with the kitchen and bathroom counters, and the scouring the kitchen and bathroom sinks. I vacuumed the downstairs and sent BoBo upstairs with the vacuum later on. I mopped the kitchen floor, and had YaYa mop the dining room.

Our house is now presentable and I can finally relax. We all can.

Posted by Juls at 7:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I couldn't sleep. I was worried about carpooling, of all things. What if my podiatrist called and wanted to see me immediately and I wouldn't have a car? I *knew* that this was no reason to skip the luxury of taking the express ride to work. She wasn't going to be calling today. I yet, it kept me awake.

I finally got out of bed at around 5 am. I took a nice long, hot shower, and sulked. I am on an emotional roller coaster full of ups and downs.

My neck was bare for the first time since Nike. I have worn my finisher necklace ever since race day. I had only removed it for my MRI last night. By this time, only my wedding ring was back on. As the hot water ran down my back, I thought about that decision to walk Nike. I thought about how I had run, and how it had hurt and I kept on running. I *had* written that I had no regrets, but now I do and there is no going back. I walked and ran sure that I didn't have a fracture - the podiatrist and the physical therapist had convinced me of that. But, now I am certain that they were wrong. In a few days, I will the results to prove it. It's not that I *want* this; it all just seems to be adding up to that.

I got out of the shower and curled up in Tom's arms and cried. When I mentioned my thoughts on Nike, he just held me tighter. There was no need to agree with me, and no need to disagree. He didn't say a thing. I love him; he has been so supportive in my running AND now in my immobility.

My neck is still bare. I will wear my finisher necklace again, but just not right now.

Posted by Juls at 3:29 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

I have been reading a lot about over-training and injuries lately. I haven't been seeking out these posts; they have just showed up in my regular blog reading. It saddens me to think that I *should* have "known better" than to push so hard in those last weeks before my injury occurred. I just felt so good. *Sigh* - but now, I don't feel so good. I am frustrated and tired of the whole thing. But I have a sneaking suspicion that I have much more to endure.

I have always been a strong advocate for "listening to my body". My body wasn't telling me to slow down though; it was saying "this is fun - go faster" and I did. I could see this happening if I had not listened to my body's messages and ignored the warning signs. That wasn't the case, and yet I instinctively knew at the point when I wrote my post on control and discipline, that I should ease up.

I DID ease up. I had only run 3 miles the day prior to the injury. My schedule had called for a 6 mile run at marathon pace. My average "moving" pace for that run was 8:41/mile, and my average pace overall (including stops for lights, etc) was 9:00/mile. I had taken the Friday off and had run 4 miles at 9:00/mile pace on Thursday. But I guess I was too late in backing off. I am not going so fast anymore. My body is now saying "Ouch - this is NO fun at all."

My MRI is scheduled for tonight. I am anxious for answers - whatever they may be - and treatment. I can't be sure, but I don't think that the Ibuprofen or ultrasounds are helping. I am not sure if the ice baths are helping either - though I don't feel much discomfort for the period of time that my foot is numb. As for the strengthening and, newly added, foot stabilization exercises, I think they are actually aggravating things. Again, I can't be sure. I do what I am told and limp along the path for supposed recovery.

Continue reading "Still Waiting" »

Posted by Juls at 11:55 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)

When you are injured you begin to think back to previous injuries, or problems that you have had with the failing body part. Recently, I've thought about my ankle and the past problems that have surfaced in my running history. My history is minimal, but I did have one significant childhood illness that I am occaisionally reminded of.

When I was in junior high school, I was also very active. I ran on the school’s cross-country and track teams, competed on the gymnastic team, and was on a neighborhood swim team during the summer. I loved sports and gave it my all.

One morning I awoke with the feeling that my legs were asleep. You know the feeling you get sometimes when you've slept funny and deprived the limb of adequate blood flow? It felt just like that, but this was different. The numbness began in my right leg and left foot, but over about an hour’s time it had made it's way up my legs to my waist. I had to crawl down the hall and yell up the stairs to wake my parents. "I think something is WRONG with me." The numbness continued and for a total of 6 days I was hospitalized where tests were done on my feet, my spine, and my brain. Even though I was not aware of any illness that my body was fighting, the doctors suspected that my body was trying to fight an illness. They said that my body had lost it’s ability to distinguish the difference between the intruding bodies (germs) and itself. My immune system had attacked the nerves in my spine and that caused the myelin sheath of my neurons to be damaged. The nerve impulses were not transmitting properly because of it.

When the numbness moved back down my legs, I saw a physical therapist to learn how to use crutches until I regained my balance. I got some strengthening exercises too. I never regained full sensation or control of my right foot.

This residual effect was so minimal that most would not have noticed: I am crazy ticklish all over (except for my right foot), and I cannot point my right toe to the same degree that my left one can (only noticeable in my gymnastics performances during adolescence). As an adult, I notice that I drag my right foot when I get tired. This has proved to be a handicap that leads to frequent and sudden trips to the pavement. *ouch*

Other than the occasional big spill, my clumsiness has not been a played a big role in my running. Or has it?

Continue reading "Ankle History" »

Posted by Juls at 4:33 PM | Permalink

There are times when it is nice to get away from the hustle and bustle. These are the times when running for miles without seeing another person can be enjoyable. But when you sign up for a road marathon, you don't go into expecting lonely miles. You expect to see people out along the way offering words of encouragement and cheering you on. It really doesn't matter that they sometimes say things like, "your almost there" when you have 7 miles to go, because you know that they mean well. These are the folks that help to keep you moving when your body is saying STOP. They are wonderful.

I have been lucky enough to have a few folks who have been there for me in my past races. I have run marathons where I get to see them along the way, others where they are only at the end, and one marathon where they were cheering from the other side of the country. Knowing that they are cheering me on makes such a difference. It is especially nice to when I can look forward to seeing them in the miles ahead.

Today was my day to give a little bit of that support back. I especially wanted to be out there for Cindy, who has lead my cheering squad on a number of occasions.

Continue reading "Giving Back" »

Posted by Juls at 8:10 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)

First things first: As usual, for Saturday, the day started out with football. BoBo's school was going head to head with my alma mater. I was looking forward to a good game.

It was clear however, that freshman football was not a part of many of this school's priorities. Their stands were empty; they only had about a dozen people sitting on the home side, while we had upwards of 50 people. We proceeded to cream them 30-something to zero. I felt a little bad for them. Perhaps with a little more support they would improve.

BoBo's team hip-hopped, in their yellow bus, all the way back to our school. Apparently, the bus driver gave a little music lesson to the boys in order to get them clapping to the beat of the music (rather than that of the bumps in the road). They were clapping to the beat as they drove into the parking lot and were met with pizza and home baked brownies and snicker-doodles. Support - That's what I'm talking about.

After returning home, it was time for a "real" work out. Why? Because, I have not had a truly good workout in 3 weeks now. I really "needed" one. I didn't waste any time getting it started