nothing like it.
as promised monday.... yesterday i ran.
its been a while. and by a while i mean... several weeks.
and by several weeks i mean... somwhere upwards of two months.
*shock* *horror*
i know.
i lost my passion, my love of running somewhere towards the end of training for RNR San Diego. i admit it. the race wasn't great, running afterwards wasn't great... was painful AND not great, which is just an ugly mix.
and i got kinda... well. pissed
so. i stopped. it was more frustration than it was worth, i started biking, and swimming... i started crossfit (and loving it. people. do yourself a favor, and check it out... its addictive.)
anyway. point being.... running took a, what looked like at the time, semi-permanent back-seat to the rest.
and by back seat i mean wrapped up, boxed up and tucked in the trunk never to be thought of again.
sers'ly.
but its been a few months. and i've had some stresses.. here at work. in my personal life. etc... and...
yeah, sure. biking is great. i'm probably more suited for biking. swimming is phenomenal, and... i'm not a fish, but.. i'm def'ly growing gills. crossfit... well, you all know how i feel about crossfit, but......
they're not running.
biking is hard. in a way that running isn't. it requires much more thought, with the constant shifting, checking bikers around me, intersections, etc... my mind can't wander.
swimming.. well. for those of you, like me, only just now growing gills... you know just how much concentration it takes to stroke, breathe, rotate, swim straight, kick from hips, don't use your legs, stroke, breathe...
its exhausting just the mental aspect of the whole thing. plus you can't just, you know... stop
cuz hi whats up drowning. and death, i hear, ain't all its cracked up to be. so YOU know.
so i've started to kind of miss running. the feeling of running... the emotional, kind of mental.. not spiritual, thats not the right word, but.. the experience of running. all of it as one... i started missing it.
i missed the way i can think or not think.. zone out or zone in. push myself up the hill, get tired, yell at myself for stopping and then push myself up again. the whole process... i just miss it. i miss the way i feel afterwards. after a good run. i miss the feeling of freedom it gives me, from the day. from my work. from my friends. from everything...
i miss it. i've missed it.
so... finally, with the RBF Music Exchange and the fantastic mix i received and a few things going on that have just driven me to NEED to run...
i ran.
i ran, and i ran, and i ran.
and its not that i ran FAR... its that i ran.
the last few runs... 2ish months ago.... they sucked. i couldn't go half a mile and not stop to contemplate why i was out there, how much it sucked and screw this. i'm heading back.
no. yesterday... i ran. i thought i was tired, and i told myself i'd take a break and walk, but then... my legs would just... run.
down to the old Disciplinary Barracks.. up to the stables, past the fire station.. up to the intersection of the graveyard... turning to tackle the one last mini-incline along the row of houses and finally, back along the golf course. a good 3ish miles.
and i didn't just run... i ran fast.
i'd forgotten all about my garmin.. didn't even cross my mind, so.. i couldn't measure it. i don't know my time, exactly... but i know i was faster than normal. i could feel the new found strength in my legs... i could feel the burn of oxygen in my lungs.. i ran fast. and i didn't stop.
and i loved it.
i got back and looked at the clock... i think averaged maybe somewhere around 10:30/miles.
and... y'all know me. you know thats phenomenal, i almost don't have to say it because.. y'all know.
i was thrilled.
i love my new life. my life of biking, and swimming.. crossfit and the power and strength i'm gaining from all of it.. but.
its not running.
there's nothing like the pride i feel after a run.
after a good run.
it doesn't happen all that often for me. runnings a struggle.. to a degree it probably always will be. but..
there's nothing like it, and thats what keeps me coming back for more!
Comments
okay i need to drink the water youre drinking bc i cant get over my HATRED for running right now. i want to love running again. i want that amazing feeling of getting a great run in, zoning everything and everyone out and just concentrating on pounding th pavement. im not there yet :( the guys at crossfit laugh at me when the WOD involves running as they say in unison, looking at me "kim HATES running"...and i do! make it stop!
Posted by: Kim | August 25, 2006 09:04 AM
Phew! For a while there, I thought we were going to have to call you Little Miss Biker Swimmer Crossfit Pants! Welcome back! Nothing wrong with taking a reprieve. Gotta do what's right for you.
Posted by: Wes | August 25, 2006 09:36 AM
Welcome back from your rest - glad running does so much for you - I can relate! I almost didn't click on that crossfit link because I thought it was going to be one of those web time wasters and I have enough of those :)
Posted by: Jessica | August 25, 2006 10:03 AM
Welcome back to running! It sounds great that you have a good variet of suff now. The CrossFit stuff lots great. Too bad there is not one close to me. Good to hear that you enjoyed your run.
Posted by: Al Durham | August 25, 2006 10:11 AM
Yea for you, everyting ebbs and flows. I have some thoughts on the very same issue but won't muddy up your comments with them.
You are a runner, I have seen it in your posts. But more then that you are an athelete. Stay balanced. :)
Posted by: Bob | August 25, 2006 10:19 AM
So how does the Crossfit thing work anyways? Do you need to have some local affiliate or can you do it on your own? Some of those exercises are insane! The handstand pushup?! I can do neither a handstand nor a pushup (pathetic, I know), never mind together!
Posted by: Danielle in Iowa | August 25, 2006 10:21 AM
The triathlon learning curve is really steep at the begining, but if you stick with it, you'll be glad you did. You never stop learning either.
As the cliche goes, you never really appreciate something till its gone. Yeah there's nothing like the feeling after a good run.
Posted by: qcmier | August 25, 2006 10:55 AM
"And I ran, I ran so far away.
I just ran, I ran all night and day.
I couldn't get away..."
-As sung by Flock of Seagulls' lead singer A.Maria
Posted by: Haight | August 25, 2006 11:57 AM
Maybe someday, when i grow up...i'll be like you! i already know that after the marathon i gotta concentrate on something other than running..cuz it's making me mental.. (OK more mental)
so get ready to coach me. i'll check out crossfit, but from what danielle says, um, not in this lifetime!
Posted by: jeanne | August 25, 2006 11:59 AM
Love the new width of your window!! How did you KNOW that i was hoping for that! you're psychic.
Posted by: jeanne | August 25, 2006 12:00 PM
Hey, good for you to get back out there. That's the nice thing about running - no matter how long you're away from it, it's always there waiting for you, right outside your door.
Posted by: Donald | August 25, 2006 12:01 PM
Woo-hoo! Sounds like you just needed a break. Also, word on the biking - why's it got to be so freaking complicated?
Posted by: Anonymous | August 25, 2006 12:12 PM
I have run a grand total of 9 miles since my marathon on July 30 so I know what of you speak.
I day dream when I'm swimming all the time which probably accounts for a lot of my lack of speed issues.
I love the bike for about 40 miles. Then I'm done.
Triathlating is excellent. I'll have to check out crossfit.
Welcome back to the "R" in RBF.
Posted by: 21stCenturyMom | August 25, 2006 01:30 PM
Congrats on getting back and enjoying a good run. I've been new to reading your blogs, but am enjoying your adventures in dating...Ah running, I think it's meant to be a love/hate...I know I have both feelings for it every time I go...
Posted by: Danielle in MN | August 25, 2006 01:32 PM
Hurrah! "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step" (Confucius). Figuratively, and literally, physically and mentally. hmm, sorry for sounding crazy... thought it was sounded appropriate tho!
Posted by: gecko | August 25, 2006 02:15 PM
woot woot...Way to get back to pounding some pavement. Like you said there's nothing like a good run.
Posted by: walchka | August 25, 2006 02:31 PM
NOTHING beats a good run. Makes you forget about the 20 crappy ones that preceeded it. Nice to have you back hitting the pavement, although I love all of you adventures!
Posted by: Caren | August 25, 2006 02:40 PM
Forgot to add: love the header!
Posted by: Caren | August 25, 2006 02:41 PM
Welcome back to the world of running. I took a 2 month, then another 2 month break from running after my marathon - mostly due to injuries and just focused on cross-training. It built my leg muscles and has made me FAST.
Sounds like you need a new GOAL or FOCUS.
Posted by: Denise "Firefly" | August 25, 2006 05:27 PM
So how does this Crossfit work? Do you go to the site and get a set of exercises then go to the gym and do them?
I love addictive ... and if it'll make me go to the gym, sign me up.
Good job on the run.
Posted by: ali | August 26, 2006 03:14 PM