Little Miss Runner Pants

ok, first.. a few things.

1.) i am scared out of my mind for triathlon
2.) there were no less than 30 guys this weekend that i had the pleasure of feeling up
3.) i really need to train more/eat better

this weekend was my first triathlon experience. ever. EVER! and it um... scared me. but it was loads of fun.

because i've never been to a triathlon, as a spectator or athlete, i figured this weekend's The Big O Triathlon would be a perfect opportunity to sort of see what it's all about. how it works, what transition areas are like... swim starts, swim finishes...

the whole thing.

and, because i am a shameless seeker of hot men, i wanted to experience triathlon from... start to finish.

namely?! body marking. and half-naked men.

ohhhhhh, yeah.

i arrived on scene at about 5:30am and got to work almost immediately. there were hoards of people, volunteers and athletes, and immediately i knew it was going to be a crazy day.

it's been raining in KC for about... i dunno. 9 years. so between cars getting stuck in the mud, lightning in the distance and the constant sort of pitter patter of rain -- it was a mad house. my job, along with quite a few others, was body marking, and despite the weather and time of day...we made the best of it.

ha. YEAH we did.

can i just say, for those of you that maybe don't know, or just don't realize... um. HA! triathletes.. those men?! are some DAMN fine specimens. it was quite literally candy for the eyes. and i may or may not have thoroughly enjoyed myself.

our job was to mark each arm, each quad, and the right calf of every athlete. which means i was repeatedly asking guys to lift their shirts, pull up their shorts, or drop their pants.

i'm sorry.. does a job get any better than that!? i believe the answer is NO.

after body marking was done it was time for the mass swim group start situation, and i planted myself along the beach to watch.

this? was a bad idea.

for some reason.. and i'm still not entirely sure why... i actually thought watching a mass swim start would.. i dunno. make me feel better. as if the sheer terror i felt while watching such a thing on tv would suddenly disappear... just by being there. in person.

i? was wrong.

when i looked at the swim course i didn't think it looked that bad. it was a down and back loop the long course junkies had to do twice and.. i dunno. it just didn't seem that bad. however by the time the lead guy was making his way around for his second loop and i realized the last guy was barely half way through his first, i knew i smelled trouble. the swimmers were barely moving. it was windy, there was a storm brewing in the distance and honestly.. they just looked so tired.

i turned to 0% Tall and Short and muttered something along the lines of ...".... i dunno if i really wanna do this anymore..."... and seriously started questioning my summer of triathlon.

being the fearless kids Tall and Short are, they assured me HEY!!! its no big deal! you'll be FINE!! and i quickly shot them a zip it, or i'll HURT you! look that they of course laughed at. (Tall and Short are 0%'s little cousins who, at the ages of 13 and 14, are already far more experience in this sport than am i.

yeah. that makes me feel alllllll warm and bubbly inside.)

at about the time the last of the swimmers were exiting the water the weather really started to take a turn for the worse and what started as a 15 minute Sprint-distance delay quickly became a cancellation of the day. by that time all of the long coursers were on the bike and my no big deal race day volunteering experience was suddenly turning into RUN! TAKE COVER! get REALLY REALLY WET and STAND IN THE RAIN FOR A FEW HOURS!

afterwards Tall ,Short, 0% and i had lunch, waited for 0% guy to get home, and sat around recounting the days events. the 0% family had one crazy story after another and although it was a fun day and i enjoyed myself, i definitely went home wondering how on earth i'm going to survive my first race.

race day, as i knew it would be, was one helluvan experience. i can't say i really feel all that ready to do one on my own, but.. i've finally got sort of an idea of how it all fits together and.. if nothing else....

there's always volunteering.

and body marking.

and really hot men.

(pffft. if that doesn't motivate me to get out there.. nothing will!)