Little Miss Runner Pants

every once in a while, when i'm feeling very sentimental and self-reflective, i get the urge to read my old journals.

i've been keeping a journal of some sort now for about as long as i can remember. they were my outlet at a young age when, as an only child who moved around a lot, i didn't always have someone to talk to.

i was never very regular about it... usually i'd just write something silly, talking about the latest gossip drama, the boy i had a crush on, or the way my parents were absolutely RUINING my life!

it wasn't until college and my first taste of study abroad that i really started using a journal to get my thoughts out. to put ideas, dreams, frustrations and experiences down on paper. that first study abroad.. the summer after junior year, my summer spent in Mexico...

those three months changed my life. forever. in a way i don't think i'll ever quite be able to explain.

these days, when i'm feeling reflective, its that journal i read first. its those first weeks for not knowing what to expect, what i wanted, who i was and those last few weeks of having really come into my own that... i don't know. they speak to me. even now.

so last night, after an excruciatingly hard workout at crossfit, one i could not have done a few months ago... after coming home and reading that old stuff... it made me laugh.

for as on top of the world, i can do/be anyone/thing!, sort of bright and cheery and hopeful as i was, as much as i was feeling like.. i dunno... the world is my OYSTER!!!.. i don't think i ever thought i would be this.

of who i am now.

and it made me laugh.

so many of us, especially us, we work hard. everyday. we work and we train and we drive and yet we rarely achieve.

i mean we do achieve. but we rarely really TALK about it. we always talk about our goals. where we want to be. how much harder we should be/could be working. the weight we want to lose, the muscle we want to gain. those few seconds we'd like to shave off of our swim/run/biking pace.

and we talk about why. about our motivation. our inspiration. we talk. and we work. and then we talk some more about how we need to work.

and i think sometimes, the fact that we've achieved, ... we take it for granted, and it slips our minds.

so today, i'm just saying, take a second and brag.

BRAG! brag about yourself, about what you can do. where how what you were before and where how what you are now. be outwardly proud. demand attention. really praise yourself. screw how corny it sounds. if you never appreciate where you are, whats the point in trying to go further?

let your own accomplishments be what drive you to go harder, faster, longer.

and then when you're done turn back around, roll up your sleeves, lace up your shoes, and get back out there and do whatever it is that you've been doing, that's gotten you to where you are!!