Out-of-Shape Ultrarunner Seeks Six-Pack
Yeah, it didn't work.
"No wonder you got injured doing an ultra," he snickers. Mandisa warbles in the background.
I roll over to do leg lifts on the other side. I slowly count to 10, breathing hard while I work my hip abductors (I think) and trying to hear Simon verbally smack another contestant upside the head.
"Huh. I guess you must have had some good cardio fitness. Just not muscular," the peanut gallery pipes up.
I try to work on my hip adductors (I think). I lie on my left side and prop my right foot on the edge of Ash's toy box. I groove with Taylor singing something about the city as I try to raise my left leg up to my right. ...8...9...10.
I groan as I roll on to my back. This time, I tackle my abs. Bring my legs up, thighs perpendicular to the ground, and slowly lower one leg at a time. My entire body shakes with the intensity of performing this, and each exhale is a loud grunt.
After three reps of each exercise, I slowly come to standing, and reach for my yoga mat. Must. Stretch. Body.
More groans. I'm off-balance. I slip on the copy of Runner's World magazine that had the exercises in it. I see a commercial with women standing on one leg and pulling the other one up behind their head, and decide I can do that. I enlist the peanut gallery's help, and hurt my knee as I topple to the ground, almost waking Ash.
I collapse into Ash's toddler-size couch in time to watch Chris Daughtry (my hero) put everyone else to shame with his cover of the Chili Pepper's cover of a Stevie Wonder song. (Why didn't anyone else get strobe lights and fog?)
Angie's plan for this year: STRENGTH TRAIN
Goal for 2006, pre-Pemberton:
strength train
Goal for 2006, post-Pemberton:
log big mileage, do more ultras soon
Goal for 2006, post-Pemberton, post-oh-my-god-that-nagging-pain-is-an-injury, post-turning-point-conversation-with-Kiera, post-strength-training-session-that-was-not:
create six-pack
(Um, no. Not even gonna try to uncover it. Just create it. I don't care if there's too much fat covering it. Right now, the only thing that matters is creating it.)
Comments
DATE: 8:54 PM, March 15, 2006
TV is boring, but wife nocking down kid's toys, falling and twisting uncomfortably all over the floor and groaning miserably is entertaining ;)
Posted by: Johnny Lyons | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 9:09 PM, March 15, 2006
That's a really good plan. I started adding strength training a couple weeks ago and it has made a big improvement on how strong I feel when I run. Those 6 pack abs are closer than you think! Ultra-Abs! I like that.
Posted by: Christine | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 9:15 PM, March 15, 2006
You can do it! I wish I was there to show you some Pilates and help you out. Way back in time (about three years ago) I started with some exercises from Runners World on the exercise ball, then I started going to Pilates, now I'm teaching it! If uncoordinated, klutzy me can do it, then I know you can!
Posted by: backofpack | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 10:47 PM, March 15, 2006
My abs got a work out just laughing at your descriptions of the strengthening/stretching going on over there. Like Johnny said - that's entertaining. My own abs can use all the help they can get.
Posted by: Darrell | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 10:55 PM, March 15, 2006
I always get those ab/adductors mixed up, too... But whatever... I'm with ya on the leg lifts, girl... Strong hips and legs make for strong running.As for the six-pack, you're my hero. I kinda just have a gel-pack thing happening...
Posted by: Sarah Elaine | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 11:18 PM, March 15, 2006
Might be easier to take up home-brewing...Just kidding! But I'll second the recommendation for Pilates from backofpack - good, good stuff.
Posted by: Jank | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 1:57 AM, March 16, 2006
I can just picture Johnny sitting there snickering, totally enjoying your agony ;-)Which Runners World were the exercises in, I can borrow previous magazine from a friend?Come to think of it my wife has a Pilates book somewhere too.Good luck with the six-pack, you can do it!
Posted by: Jack | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 2:53 AM, March 16, 2006
I bet Johnny was highly entertained by it all.I think you will notice improvements very soon, if you're really coming from such a low level, so keep at it. As for the six-pack, well, that might be a bit ambitious to start with - but you know that.
Posted by: Thomas | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 3:08 AM, March 16, 2006
The older I get, the more I appreciate my abs! It's the one spot I have to work on all the time...but it's worth it. good luck:)
Posted by: susie | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 4:40 AM, March 16, 2006
Will you get a belly-button ring with that new six-pack?? ;) Can't wait for the post of you sticking out your tongue at Johnny with your tight abs flashing him!!!
Posted by: Lora | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 6:54 AM, March 16, 2006
This is absolutely hilarious!!! Thank you Angie!OK, serious - good job and good plan. Belly-button ring helps (it did for me). So is lots of cardio - for general fat layer diminishing to see the six pack. What, by the way, as much as it was mi idea of been cool, had eventually changed into - strong abs, even if you can't see them:)Angie, you are so great, like a fresh water stream in a desert, with your searching. Thanks!
Posted by: olga | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 11:44 AM, March 16, 2006
Funny post Angie. I can never get in any crunches without Haiden jumping on my belly.
Posted by: Mike | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 12:08 PM, March 16, 2006
In my case just add Pippin getting on, underneath and just generally in the way!! Brent's really going to be laughing when he can bounce a quarter off my stomach!
Posted by: Rae | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 3:27 PM, March 16, 2006
I haven't been strength training much through my marathon training...think I alluded to that in a recent post...but I do think it's important and feel like I should be doing more. Live and learn.Can't help but think that core strength will help get you through anything. So...don't let the peanut gallery disuade your efforts. (I always hide when I do any non-traditional workout or my peanut gallery won't leave me alone for days about it. LOL)
Posted by: Kim | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 12:01 AM, March 17, 2006
Yeah, we all know how good strength training is, and yet what a pain in the butt it is to perform! Personally, I think I've got a six-pack in there somewhere... it's just hiding behind all the chocolate and beer...
Posted by: Liv | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 8:42 AM, March 17, 2006
It's not France but the flags look alike. It's St. Maarten and St. Barts flag. I am also going to Puerto Rico and St. Thomas. Family vacation.
Posted by: Dirt Runner | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 6:05 PM, March 17, 2006
I like to remind myself that I have a six-pack unfortunately I just can't see it because it is covered by too much fat. And no, I am not calling you fat. I just thought you might enjoy that I am too lazy to uncover that six-pack. Maybe one of these days. You and Johnny and Ash have a good weekend.
Posted by: Rob | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
DATE: 10:23 AM, March 18, 2006
Go Chris Daughtry! Yes, that was Hartnell. What does your dad do there? You can e-mail me,
Posted by: Donald | April 2, 2006 01:07 PM
I can't believe it, my co-worker just bought a car for $23063. Isn't that crazy!
Posted by: Betsy Markum | May 19, 2006 09:22 AM