« April 2007 | Main | June 2007 »
May 29, 2007
Pieces of a Puzzle
Life is finally coming together. Tonight I have to make a choice that is independent of the results I receive tomorrow and once made, I have to stick with it, no matter how hard it is. Because the choice is between a definite DNS and a possible DNF.
The past 4 weeks have been hard. I have struggled to keep myself from running and cycling and swimming and I felt like I was going to go out of my mind because I couldn't go out onto the road and do something other than sit on my behind. But now I'm starting to feel a whole lot better and I know I'm not allowed to start running yet, which frustrates me more.
The one thing that I've noticed is a severe lack of energy on my part though. I walk up the stairs and am out of breath. I love taking the stairs at work and right now I'm one of those that wait for the lift to arrive. Unfortunately our house has 3 levels, and we haven't fitted a lift, which means I have to walk up the stairs to get to my bedroom. Sixteen stairs. That's all it takes to make me out of breath and a few minutes later some aching joints join me where I sit puffing on a couch or on the bed.
The doctor told me that this might continue for as long as 2 months and that initially I'll always be left feeling weak and unable to do much. It should improve though - in very small baby steps. The real question though, is whether or not it'll get better in time for Ironman? As much as it pains me to say this, I somehow don't think it will. I think I'll be standing there on the day, scared beyond movement because I haven't been able to complete my training as I would've liked.
So tonight, I'll dream about Ironman and put this puzzle together. Do I go to the start and hope for the best, or do I withdraw and try again next year?
Posted by karinm at 9:36 PM | Comments (2)
May 26, 2007
A Long Time
Tracks to Nowhere
For the past few weeks I've kept myself quiet at home and hoped that if I didn't do anything I shouldn't, I would get better sooner rather than later. Well, at first I got a lot better, then I spent a few nights in hospital and came back home. Tonight I'm lying in bed, wishing that when I go back to the doctors on Monday, she'll tell me that I am okay and that I can start training again. Even it if is only in 2 week's time.
On a more upbeat note - congratulations to Jeff and his wife who is welcoming a new addition to their family this weekend! I know you two will make fabulous parents and that little Thunderclap will make you incredibly happy!
Posted by karinm at 9:16 PM | Comments (0)
May 1, 2007
Virus detected
16 weeks.
That's the amount of time until Ironman UK. And for 6 of those 16 weeks, I'm not allowed to train, which just wiped out the Iroman UK 2007 dream. I cried. I wanted to beg, but who? I cried some more. And then I realised I have so much to be thankful for and 6 months don't really matter that much... does it? To wait 6 months more to finish a 140.6 mile race.
In short - I caught a virus and from what the doctor tells me, I'll either have a heart attack or damage my heart severely if I do training.
I don't know what to say. I still feel too much like I've lost a friend.
Posted by karinm at 12:05 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack